M*A*S*H (2012)

1 - The Best of Enemies

On his way to some R&R in Tokyo, a North Korean soldier forces Hawkeye to perform an emergency roadside operation on his buddy.

1 - Too Many Cooks

A clumsy foot soldier, Look out below Conway, finds the quickest way to the crews heart, boosting morale at the 4077th by cooking gourmet delights. Only Colonel Potter, burdened with a personal crisis, is immune from the high spirits enveloping the hospital.

1 - Commander Pierce

Hawkeye undergoes a drastic change when he becomes temporary commander of the 4077th, and learns about the tedious bureaucracy and accompanying headaches that Colonel Potter deals with daily.

1 - Fade Out, Fade In

Frank Burns cracks up over Margarets marriage while on R&R in Tokyo, and Major Charles Emerson Winchester III is sent to the 4077th as a replacement by a vindictive superior officer.

1 - Bug Out

When a rumor for a camp relocation turns out to be real, Hawkeye, Margaret and Radar volunteer to stay behind for a patient who cannot be moved.

1 - Welcome to Korea

Trapper is shipped home while Hawkeye is on R&R. Hawkeye speeds to Kimpo with Radar to catch Trappers plane, but they just miss him. While they are there, they pick up BJ Hunnicut and take him back to camp. On the way back, BJ is introduced to the Korean War.

1 - The General Flipped at Dawn

The MASH 4077 is visted by General Steele. He wishes to move the camp 5 miles down the road. Hawkeye and Henry are charged with mutiny. And Hawkeye is also charged with impersonating a reporter.

1 - Divided We Stand

Brought on by Frank and Margarets negative reports, General Clayton assigns a psychiatrist, Captain Hildebrand, to examine the 4077th M*A*S*H unit, to see if it should be disbanded. Henry tells them to be on their best behavior, or else they will be split up. But the 4077th soon begins to act in the

1 - Pilot

At the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital (M.A.S.H) unit in Korea, two army doctors by the names of Hawkeye Pierce and Trapper John McIntyre receive some exciting news in the mail. Their Korean house boy, Ho-John got accepted into Hawkeyes old college. Hawkeye and Trapper decide to hold a party fi

2 - Letters

Members of the 4077th share their impressions of war in response to letters from fourth graders in Hawkeyes hometown. Margaret writes about how there are some patients she will never forget, whilst the Colonel tells of his days as Hoops Potter. Hawkeye: Dear Ronnie, its a shame to let the love you h

2 - Are You Now, Margaret?

A Congressional aide, Williamson, visits the 4077th on a supposedly routine fact-finding tour, but its discovered that his motives are far deeper - too uncover Margaret as a communist sympathizer. His case is full of innuendo, so the gang set out to help Margaret.

2 - Peace On Us

Hawkeye becomes so disgusted with the stalled Panmunjon peace talks that he impulsively takes matters into his own hands, and goes to the meetings to lend a hand.

2 - Fallen Idol

Radar has always looked up to Hawkeye and admired him as his hero. But after suffering a Jeep accident en route to R&R at Hawkeyes behest. Radar questions his own hero worship. Particularly when he and his hero have a falling out.

2 - Margaret;s Engagement

Margaret, calling from Tokyo, holds the camp in suspense until she returns with the news of her engagement to Lieutenant Colonel Donald Penobscott. Frank Burns takes the news hard and arrests a Korean family as spies.

2 - Change of Command

Frank settles in as commanding officer, only to have a new one appointed over his head, one that, to his chagrin, fits in very well.

2 - Rainbow Bridge

As Hawkeye and Trapper are planning to leave for Tokyo, an unusual offer to swap POW patients between the Chinese and the 4077th comes in. Henry, after much debate, agrees to send Hawkeye, Trapper, Frank, Radar, and Klinger into enemy territory. Frank almost botches the swap when he brings a squirt

2 - 5 OClock Charlie

An inept North Korean pilot, known as 5 OClock Charlie, makes his daily attempt to bomb the ammo dump. Frank puts in a request for an anti-aircraft gun, which is granted when Charlie hits General Claytons jeep. Frank takes charge of the gun, while Hawkeye and Trapper are determined to prevent him us

2 - To Market, to Market

To Market, to Market is the second episode of M*A*S*H. It was first aired on September 24, 1972 and repeated on April 29, 1973. Like many other M*A*S*H episodes, this one parodies army bureaucracy.

3 - Cementing Relationships

A jilted Italian soldier, Corpsman Ignazio De Simone, is smitten by Margaret; Klinger pours a cement floor in the operating room to fight the spread of germs.

3 - Guerilla My Dreams

The arrival of a wounded Korean woman sparks a conflict at the 4077th: Hawkeye wants to heal her, but a steely ROK officer, Lt. Park, is more anxious to question her about alleged guerilla activities.

3 - Lil

Colonel Potter meets a female soldier of the same age and interests as himself, named Lil. The others in the camp think that he might be cheating on Mildred, even though his friendship with Lil is completely platonic. Meanwhile Hawkeye tries to find out what B.J.s initials stand for. As it turns out

3 - Last Laugh

Madness strikes as B.J. and his old friend Bardonaro play a series of practical jokes on each other, just as Bardonaro is about to leave Korea. Hawkeye gets the last laugh. He sends Bardonaro off without his traveling papers, and in a jeep with too little gas.

3 - Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Hawkeye is temporarily blinded while trying to fix the nurses furnace, and Frank finds a sure-fire way to win bets on baseball games.

3 - It Happened One Night

A freezing night, an artillery barrage thats coming too close, a patient going downhill, and Franks searching Hot Lips tent for his letters.

3 - Officer of the Day

While Henry is away in Seoul, Burns and Houlihan are in charge, and Hawkeye is the officer of the day. His refusal to release a wounded Korean soldier, wanted by US Intelligence, leads to a confrontation with Colonel Flagg.

3 - Radars Report

Radar writes the weekly activity report. Hawkeye operates on a wounded prisoner who grabs a scalpel and attacks the doctors. Frank wants Klinger thrown out on a section 8,so Henry calls in a psychiatrist, Major Freedman. Hawkeye is attracted to a new nurse but thinks she is married. Trapper loses a

3 - Requiem for a Lightweight

Trapper and Hawkeye seek to keep a new nurse from being transferred by Hot Lips, and they vie for her affection. Henry Blake, challenged by another commander to a boxing tournament, makes Trapper fight a big, intimidating soldier in exchange for keeping the nurse at the 4077th. Hawkeye and Ugly John

4 - Father;s Day

Margaret has trouble pretending shes a chip off the old block when her dad, blood and guts Howitzer Al Houlihan, arrives for a visit. Also, Hawkeye fixes up a soldier who repays them with a large side of steak, but the general who it belongs to is really steamed.

4 - Good-Bye Radar: Part 1

On leave in Tokyo, Radar is desperately needed back at the crisis-stricken 4077th, but his return is delayed by outside events. While casualties continue to pour in from the front, the 4077ths generator conks out, and the backup has been stolen, depriving the medical unit of all electrical power. Bu

4 - Our Finest Hour

Newscaster Clete Roberts, reprising an earlier interview appearance, returns to update Korean War conditions, when he conducts a series of television talks with the leading characters of the 4077th.

4 - War of Nerves

The 4077th, caught up in tension and nerves, creates a bonfire to release their pressure. Meanwhile, Sidney Freedman is depressed over a young soldier who blames him for his injuries, because Freedman had sent him back into combat.

4 - Lt. Radar O;Reilly

Following an offer of promotion made by Master Sergeant Woodruff at a poker game, Radar is promoted to the rank of lieutenant. Finding this position awkward, Radar opts to return to his position as an enlisted man.

4 - The Late Captain Pierce

When Hawkeyes father is notified that hes dead, he finds its no easy matter either to get word to him or to establish otherwise.

4 - Iron Guts Kelly

General Iron Guts Kelly arrives for an inspection, and ends up dying in Margarets tent. Hawkeye and Trapper help the Generals aide smuggle him out of camp. The next day he is reported killed at the front, as that is where he would have wanted to die.

4 - For the Good of the Outfit

Hawkeye and Trapper want the army to admit responsibility for the accidental bombing of a local village. They fill out a report and Major Stoner arrives to investigate, and leaves with all the evidence. When the story is released it claims that the enemy bombed the village, and the army tries to gag

4 - Chief Surgeon Who?

Frank Burns complains about Hawkeye Pierces disrespect...and Henry appoints Hawkeye chief surgeon, to Burnss shock. The rest of the 4077th coronates Hawk while Frank and Hot Lips complain to General Barker. The Generals visit provides him with a view of life at the 4077th M*A*S*H unit: camp hijinks,

5 - Death Takes a Holiday

Hawkeye, B.J., and Margaret try to save the life of a critically injured solider so that his family wont think of Christmas as the day that their father died. Meanwhile, Winchester fulfills a family Christmas tradition but has trouble maintaining the anonymity required to keep it a truly charitable

5 - Good-Bye Radar: Part 2

As company clerk Radar OReilly reluctantly prepares to depart the 4077th, the unit is still without electricity due to a broken generator, and the operating room continues to fill up with war wounded as night falls. The responsibility for procuring a new generator falls on Klinger, who lacks Radars

5 - The Billfold Syndrome

Charles becomes so irate, when he is turned down for a future medical position at home, that he refuses to talk to anyone in the unit, until Hawkeye and B.J. send him a false telegram from home. Meanwhile, a young soldier, Jerry Wilson, cant remember his own identity, so Sidney Freedman is called fo

5 - The Winchester Tapes

Hawkeye tries unsuccessfully to get to Seoul, to see Nurse Gilmore for the weekend. Meanwhile, Winchester has taped a letter home, asking for his influential parents to help get him back to the States. To get even, Hawkeye and B.J. switch Winchesters clothes, causing Winchester to alter his eating p

5 - The Nurses

The nurses go behind Margarets back so that a fellow nurse confined to her tent can spend the night with her soldier husband who is paying her a surprise visit.

5 - Hey, Doc

Its quid pro quo at the 4077th: two bottles of Scotch for secret surgery, and a tank to scare off snipers for an unauthorized shot of penicillin.

5 - O.R.

The OR is filled with more wounded than the unit can handle. Hawkeye does heart massage on a soldier, which saves his life, but he dies four hours later. Sidney Freedman drops in during the deluge, and is dragged into the fray by Hawkeye.

5 - Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde

Hawkeye has been in non-stop surgery for 3 straight days without sleep, and the wounded keep coming. He decides to find out who started the war, and sends a telegram to Harry S Truman. After listening to some of Franks rubbish about the North Koreans wanting better plumbing, he tries to send the off

5 - The Moose

Sergeant Baker arrives at the camp with his Moose. Hawkeye decides to find a way of getting her away from Baker. He tries ordering him to release her, tries buying her, and then resorts to cheating at cards. He releases her but she wont go, so he tries to teach her how to be independent.

6 - A War for All Seasons

On New Years Eve, the staff looks back on the highlights of 1951: The doctors invent an artificial kidney machine; Mulcahy plants a garden; Margaret takes up knitting; and Klinger and Winchester bet on which baseball team will win the pennant.

6 - Period of Adjustment

Klinger and BJ both have Radar related woes, causing them to go on a drinking binge. A drunken BJ becomes violent with Hawkeye.

6 - None Like It Hot

As the temperatures reach triple digits, Hawkeye and BJ recieve their new rubber bathtub from Abercrombie & Fitch. However, soon the whole camp is hot under the collar as word leaks out about the tub and everyone wants a dip, except for Klinger, who is trying to get his Section 8 by wearing a fur co

6 - The Light That Failed

With supplies low, the 4077th gets a truckload of ice cream churns and salt tablets. But what it needs are light bulbs, and in the dimly lit post-op Charles makes an error for which he draws the ultimate wrath of his two surgeon bunkmates. Meanwhile, B.J. receives a mystery novel that everyone in c

6 - The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan

Margaret takes off in the middle of the night to help deliver a Korean baby. Nobody knows of her whereabouts, and Colonel Flagg is brought in to help investigate her disappearance.

6 - The Bus

Radar is driving Hawk, B.J., Sherman, and Frank in a bus back from a medical conference when they get lost. They stop to see if they can find anything they recognize. When they decide to turn around, they find that the bus does not want to start. Radar goes off in the middle of the night for the

6 - Springtime

When spring arrives, Klinger gets word from home that his sweetheart back in Toledo wants to marry him. Henry arranges for Father Mulcahy to do this over short wave radio. Radar falls in love with a nurse, while a grateful patient wont leave Hawkeye alone, and even threatens Major Burns.

6 - Kim

Hawkeye operates on a 5-year old Korean boy, and Radar cant find his family. Henry plans to send him to the orphanage, and the camp enjoys his company while they can. Trapper decides to adopt him after consulting his wife, and has to rescue him after he wanders into the minefield. Kims mother turns

6 - Yankee Doodle Doctor

The 4077th is designated as the setting for the making of an army film on Mobile Army Surgical Hospital units. Hawkeye is chosen as the star while Margaret and Frank compose a screenplay. The Eye Of The Hawk objects to the piece of propaganda that filmmaker Lt. Bricker is producing and, having expos

7 - Your Retention Please

Klinger is so depressed by news that his ex-wife plans to remarry, he reenlists for an additional six-year hitch. Meanwhile, a male nurse has a gripe against the army.

7 - Nurse Doctor

A beautiful and ambitious young nurse, Harris, who plans to become a doctor when she leaves the Army, finds herself in a misunderstanding with Father Mulcahy. Meanwhile, the camps water supply is depleted, and the rest of the 4077th is more concerned about where their next shower will come from.

7 - They Call the Wind Korea

A strong windstorm affects the M*A*S*H personnel in varying ways: Hawkeye and most of the unit busy themselves securing items that could blow away; Radar prepares his animal hutch for the worst; a disgusted Charles switches his Tokyo-leave transportation from air to ground, and runs into a difficult

7 - In Love and War

Hawkeye falls in love with Kyong Soon, a Korean woman who is caring for her sick mother and orphaned children. But all hope is lost as Kyong takes her possessions and the children to the south after her mother has died.

7 - Dear Sigmund

Psychiatrist Sidney Freedman composes a letter to Sigmund Freud during a visit to the 4077, while the rest of the camp endures the hijinks of a mystery prankster.

7 - Dear Mildred

Its Potters anniversary. While Potter writes home, Frank and Hot Lips have a wood carving made for him, and Radar rescues a horse and makes him a present of it.

7 - Check-Up

Trapper gets an ulcer and a ticket home. Unfortunately, his going-away party is spoiled by a new Army regulation, which forces him to stay.

7 - L.I.P. (Local Indigenous Personnel)

Corporal Walker is being sent home, and he wants to marry his Korean girl so she and their baby can return with him. CID sends Lt Willis to investigate, but when he refuses Hawkeye and Trapper frame him. Hawkeye is upset that a nurse he was pursuing does not approve of the marriage between a gook an

7 - Bananas, Crackers and Nuts

When Henry goes for some R&R, Hawkeye pretends to crack up so that Frank will let him and Trapper go on some R&R.

8 - Tell It to the Marines

Winchester takes command during Potters absence; and B.J. and Hawkeye try to convince the Marines to grant a hardship discharge to an immigrant soldier, Private Jost Van Liter.

8 - Private Finance

A South Korean Woman misinterprets Klingers motives when he tries to aid her daughter financially. Meanwhile, Hawkeye wrestles with his conscience over a promise made to a dying soldier, Eddie Hastings.

8 - Major Ego

Captain Tom Greenleigh of Stars and Stripes comes to the 4077th to write an article about Charles, which makes him act even more egotistical than usual. Meanwhile, Margeret finds out her estranged husband Donald has tied up their joint account, while fending off at first -- then accepting -- the adv

8 - Change Day

Charles plans a scheme to get rich when he discovers that blue scrip is going to be exchanged for red. Hawkeye and B.J. outsmart him, and he is left holding the worthless scrip. Klinger tries to get into West Point so that he can get out of Korea.

8 - Mulcahy;s War

Father Mulcahy, troubled by his lack of experience at the front, insists on accompanying Radar for an errand there.

8 - The Kids

The 4077th plays host to kids bombed out of their orphanage, and at the same time has to deliver a baby and care for battle casualties.

8 - Life With Father

Mail from home worries Henry that Lorraine may be seeing other men. Father Mulcahy presides over a Jewish circumcision ceremony for the Korean-born son of a US GI.

8 - The Trial of Henry Blake

Majors Houlihan and Burns press charges against Colonel Blake to get him arrested and put Frank in charge, and put Hawkeye and trapper under arrest so that they cant help him. Fortunately for Henry, they escape, and with the aid of Meg Cratty come to the rescue.

8 - Cowboy

John Hodges, a chopper pilot referred to as The Cowboy because of his gun holster belt and cowboy hat, has been hit in the shoulder, and arrives at the 4077th. He is expecting a letter--hes worried his wife Jean at home is leaving him for another man (Shes probably off with some rodeo rider; shes a

9 - Mr. and Mrs. Who?

Charles returns to the 4077th after a trip to Tokyo with an uncharacteristic hangover and the uneasy feeling of a romantic entanglement. Meanwhile, the hospital struggles to find a cure for an outbreak of deadly hemorrhagic fever.

9 - Baby, It;s Cold Outside

While everyone is complaining about the record cold snap, Charles becomes the most unpopular man in camp, when his parents send him a winter-ized polar suit that he insists on flaunting in front of everyone.

9 - Images

Radar notices a number of tattoos on one of the wounded, and convinces himself that with a tattoo he will be irresistible to women. Everyone tries to discourage him, and he admits to having received a tattoo that will wash off. Meanwhile, Margaret is frustrated with a new nurse who keeps getting up

9 - The Korean Surgeon

Instead of turning him in as a prisoner of war, Hawkeye and B.J. pull some strings to get a wounded North Korean surgeon a spot on the staff.

9 - Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler

Intelligence officer Colonel Flagg, and psychiatrist Sidney Freedman, grapples over the fate of a wounded officer, Captain Chandler, who claims to be Jesus Christ. Perhaps the most poignant scene is when Radar asks Chandler to bless his teddy bear.

9 - Alcoholics Unanimous

Henrys departure to Tokyo leaves Major Burns in charge of the 4077th. He declares total prohibition of alcohol, which leads to a near riot amongst the camp, especially from Hawkeye and Trapper.

9 - Dear Dad... Three

Once more Hawkeye writes home to his father: the doctors operate on a soldier with a grenade shot into his body; Hawkeye and Trapper colour the skin of a racist patient, who demanded the right colour blood, while he is asleep; Henry gets a movie of his daughters birthday from home; the officers hold

9 - Henry Please Come Home

Henry receives a citation for the camp achieving the best efficiency rating, and then General Hammond reassigns him to Tokyo. Frank then changes the camp to be more military, and he confiscates Hawkeyes and Trappers still. They use forged passes to go to Tokyo to convince Henry to come back and end

10 - The Yalu Brick Road

Hawkeye and BJ lose their way while rushing urgently needed antibiotics to the 4077th, which is wracked with low-mileage Thanksgiving turkey-induced salmonella. Wandering back to M*A*S*H, the pair are found by a peculiar North Korean soldier.

10 - Point of View

In this unique episode, the camera becomes the eyes of a young wounded soldier. It records his sensory responses to being wounded, flown by helicopter to the 4077th, examined, operated on, and treated in post-operation.

10 - The M*A*S*H Olympics

Colonel Potter, deciding that the camp is out of shape, enforces a calisthenics course. When nobody is enjoying it, he makes it fun by splitting the camp into two teams. These teams compete for three day R&R passes. Klinger tries to get out of the army by getting fat.

10 - Hawkeye Get Your Gun

Hawkeye and Potter provide assistance at a Korean clinic, and run into an enemy attack on the way home. Meanwhile, Klinger begins posing as a Gypsy to help get his discharge papers.

10 - Dear Peggy

B.J. writes home to his wife, Peg, reporting Klingers escape attempts, the visit of a formidable chaplain, and one of Franks goof-ups.

10 - There is Nothing Like a Nurse

The nurses are evacuated when the threat of an enemy parachute drop arises. Hawkeye and Trapper try to enliven everyones spirits whilst they are gone. Hawkeye: The plot thins. Watch the cake sue for malpractice when Frank cuts into it.

10 - The Sniper

A lone sniper has the 4077th pinned down - including Radar and Henry in the shower. The poor boy thinks hes firing on McArthurs headquarters, and a chopper finally comes by and wounds him with gunfire from above, ending the siege. Hawkeye walks out to into the bush to tend to the wounded soldier.

10 - I Hate a Mystery

A rash of thefts breaks out in the camp. Missing pieces include Franks silver picture frame, Margarets hair brush, and Trappers watch. The camp is searched and everything is found in Hawkeyes locker. Everyone thinks he did it. Hawkeye manages to announce to the camp that the items will be dusted for

11 - Life Time

Hawkeye and BJ race against the clock to save a soldier from paralysis. BJ harvesting an aorta from a dead soldier doesnt sit well with the soldiers friend.

11 - Dear Comrade

Hawkeye and B.J. discover that Charles is living the life of Riley, thanks to the attentions of his menially paid Korean servant, Comrade Park, a man of unusual skills. He has an important contribution to make - a native remedy for a seemingly insoluble medical problem.

11 - The Grim Reaper

Colonel Bloodworth threatens to press court-martial charges against Hawkeye, who shoved him in the bar. But then he becomes a patient and witnesses Hawkeyes skills. Klinger bonds with a patient from his hometown.

11 - The Colonel;s Horse

Everybody pitches in to save Colonel Potters horse, who becomes sick while Potter is away in Tokyo. And Margaret asks Hawkeye, not Frank, to operate on her appendix.

11 - Of Moose and Men

Hawkeye tangles with a tough Army colonel, Colonel Spiker, B.J. helps Zale, whos received a Dear John letter, and Frank looks endlessly for Korean saboteurs.

11 - Adam;s Ribs

Sick and tired of having liver and fish for an 11-day stretch, Hawkeye, driven near to insanity, starts a riot in the mess tent. He and Trapper then orders spare ribs and sauce from the best place he ever had them, in Chicago. Trapper calls a woman he spent a weekend with to pick up the ribs, and t

11 - Carry On, Hawkeye

The camp succumbs to the Asian flu, except for Hawkeye and Margaret, who have to do everything themselves. As the others start to recover, Hawkeye falls ill but he still manages to operate when wounded arrive. Finally the others are well enough for Hawkeye to stop working and rest. He is thanked fo

11 - Germ Warfare

Hawkeye moves a wounded North Korean soldier into The Swamp, rather than let him be shipped out before hes stable. During the night he and Trapper play Dracula, and siphon off a pint of Franks blood. The soldier then contracts hepatitis, so they have to test Frank without him knowing, and have to ke

12 - Dear Uncle Abdul

Klinger discovers that his duties as company clerk include catering to the eccentric whims of the 4077th officers. Consequently, the unusual demands by Klingers superiors leave little time to write a letter home to Toledo. Meanwhile, the Doctors are concerned about a young soldier who appears to be

12 - Out of Gas

Heavy casualties are arriving, creating severe problems for the M*A*S*H unit because they are nearly out of Pentothal. Mulcahy takes up a collection from everyone - including a case of wine from Charles private supply - and he and Charles take the jeep to make a trade with the black marketers for Pe

12 - Comrades in Arms: Part 1

Lost behind enemy lines, Hawkeye and Margaret form a personal truce and seek shelter in a roadside hut.

12 - Exorcism

To save the life of an elderly local who rejects an operation because he believes bad spirits surround the 4077th, Colonel Potter permits a Korean exorcism.

12 - Soldier of the Month

Frank has a fever and makes a will, leaving all his money to his wife and all his clothes to Hot Lips.

12 - A Full Rich Day

Hawkeye records a letter to his dad, detailing the exploits of a mad Turkish soldier who calls Hawkeye a damn good Joe, the unfortunate loss of the corpse of a Luxembourg soldier (who turns out not to be dead), Lt. Henri-Batiste LeClerc, and of a gun-happy officer.

12 - The Incubator

Hawkeye and Trapper recover from an all night party. Henry gets a barbecue, and Hawkeye puts in a request for an incubator. The Quartermaster turns him down. They locate a Major with 3 incubators, but he wont let them have one. A Colonel tries to sell them one, and then they get into trouble with a

12 - Dear Dad

Hawkeye writes home, describing Christmas in Korea: Radar ships a jeep home, a piece at a time; Henry gives the monthly lecture on sex, with the aid of figure A and figure B; Trapper helps deliver a calf; Klinger and Frank get into a fight, but Father Mulcahy smoothes things over; Hawkeye and Trappe

13 - Captains Outrageous

A brawl at Rosies Bar puts Rosie in the hospital, and the 4077th doctors are pressed into service as temporary saloon-keepers. Meanwhile, Father Mulcahy is apprehensive that his long-pending promotion to captain will again be denied. Potter: The Pentagon. Weird looking building. Four walls and a spa

13 - An Eye for a Tooth

Father Mulcahy takes being passed over for promotion philosophically until he hears of the rapid advancement made by a heroic helicopter pilot. Then his uncharacteristically bold actions stun Colonel Potter and the entire company.

13 - Comrades in Arms: Part 2

B.J. disobeys orders and goes out to find Hawkeye and Margret, who are still missing in action. Meanwhile, their romantic relationship quickly goes up in flames, and they become even more hostile toward each other.

13 - Hawk;s Nightmare

Hawkeye starts sleepwalking and having horrific nightmares. He begins to think that he may be starting to lose his war against the war.

13 - The Gun

A wounded colonels gun, a showpiece, disappears, and Hawkeye and B.J. play a hunch and bluff Frank, who has it, into returning it.

13 - Mad Dogs and Servicemen

A local dog bites Radar, and the camp conducts a search to find the pooch, so that Radar doesnt have to undergo a series of painful rabies vaccinations. Hawkeye defies Frank, to take care of a GI whos suffering from a case of hysterical paralysis.

13 - Deal Me Out

The 4077th and friends convene for their weekly “Medical Conference,” A.K.A. Poker while Radar runs over a civilian and Frank is held hostage in the showers by an enlisted man.

13 - Edwina

The nurses go to extremes lengths to find a date for Nurse Eddie - they wont go out with anyone until Eddie gets a date. The men draw straws, and Hawkeye is the big loser, especially after Eddie nearly kills him in a scene resembling teenage mating rituals.

14 - Stars and Stripes

Friction arises between B.J. and Winchester when they are asked to write an article for a prestigious medical journal, on how they saved a soldiers life with a daring operation. Meanwhile, Hot Lips receives an eventful visit from Scully, her combat soldier beau.

14 - Dear Sis

Father Mulcahy writes a pre-Christmas letter to his sister, who is a nun. He recounts his frustrations at not being more effective at the 4077th.

14 - The Merchant of Korea

After Charles hands B.J. two hundred dollars, he begins to take advantage. Everyone gets together and persuades Charles to play poker. He has incredible beginners luck until Radar discovers that Charles whistles loudly when he bluffs. They all win back their money and then some.

14 - The Most Unforgettable Characters

Radar becomes an aspiring writer after ordering a flier from a comic book, and Hawkeye and B.J. give Frank a surprise birthday present that only he will appreciate.

14 - Mail Call, Again

Mail brings a letter to Frank saying his wife is divorcing him, and one to Potter telling him hes going to be a grandfather.

14 - Private Charles Lamb

A Greek Colonel thanks the 4077th by giving them food and drink for an Easter celebration. But the feast is foiled when softhearted Radar saves the main course from the spit - a lamb, which Radar tricks Henry into giving a medical discharge and sends home to Ottumwa, Iowa. Thus, Hawkeye and Trapper

14 - Hot Lips and Empty Arms

Hot Lips gets depressed and requests a transfer, causing turmoil in the camp.

14 - Love Story

Radar gets a Dear John recording from home. Hawkeye and Trapper try to set him up with a date, but fail. Radar is taken by a new nurse at the camp and she is into poetry and music, so they coach him. Margaret wants to stop the relationship, so Hawkeye and Trapper get between her and Frank until she

15 - Yessir, That;s Our Baby

A baby born to a Korean woman and an American GI is abandoned at the 4077th. Knowing that Amer-Asian children are often mistreated in Korean society, the troop sets about the frustrating task of finding a new home for the infant.

15 - B.J. Papa San

B.J. almost becomes the surrogate father to a Korean family. Finding them a substitute for his own absent family, B.J. spends so much time with them that his medical efficiency begins to suffer, and Hawkeye worries about his health. B.J.: First they take me from my wife and kid, and just when I find

15 - The Smell of Music

Hawkeye and B.J. refuse to shower until Charles stops playing his French horn, and Colonel Potter deals with a patient who wants to kill himself because he is now disfigured.

15 - 38 Across

A fouled radio call for help on a crossword puzzle leads to a senior officer coming to the 4077th to help with a supposed serious medical problem.

15 - The Price of Tomato Juice

Radar gets the help of Hawkeye and B.J. to procure something Colonel Potter says hes fond of, but thats hard to come by - tomato juice.

15 - Bombed

The camp is under fire and is swamped with wounded. They are being attacked by their own artillery in a frightening friendly fire incident. Trapper and Margaret get trapped in the Supply Tent together. Franks jealousy of Trapper drives him to propose to Margaret.

15 - Officers Only

Klinger pretends to be pregnant. Hawkeye and Trapper operate on General Mitchells son, and the General gives them 3 days in Tokyo Henry keeps getting calls from Tokyo about what Hawkeye and Trapper are doing. When they get back to the 4077 Frank asked the general for an officers club for the camp. T

15 - Tuttle

Hawkeye creates a fake doctor, Captain Jonathan S. Tuttle, to give supplies to the local orphans. Henry wants Tuttle to be officer of the day, so Hawkeye creates a fake personnel file, and all his back pay is given to the orphanage. When General Clayton wants to reward his generosity, Hawkeye is for

16 - Bottle Fatigue

Horrified by the gigantic size of his monthly bar tab at the officers club, Hawkeye vows to give up booze for a week. Meanwhile, Winchester desperately tries to halt his sisters impending marriage to a man he considers unworthy of the Winchester heritage.

16 - Inga

Its instant attraction for Hawkeye when a beautiful Swedish doctor, called Inga, arrives to observe combat surgery. That is, until she upstages him in the operating room with a superior technique, and his ego is bruised.

16 - Patent 4077

In need of a special surgical clamp, Hawkeye and B.J. hire Mr. Shin, a local jewelry dealer, to make it. Days later the clamp is used to save the leg of a wounded soldier. Mr. Shin goes into the surgical supply business.

16 - Ping Pong

The 4077th hosts a traditional Korean wedding, much to Franks objections. And Colonel Potter runs into an old friend who has put his troops in jeopardy so that he could receive a promotion.

16 - Dear Ma

Radar writes home to his mother, as Hawkeye conducts the camp foot inspection, and Colonel Potter gets some shrapnel in his backside.

16 - Bulletin Board

Camp activities include Henrys nervous delivery of a sex lecture, with Hawkeyes and Trappers heckling, a Shirley Temple movie, and a cookout.

16 - Henry in Love

Henry returns from a week in Tokyo, to announce that he is in love with a 20-year old girl called Nancy Sue Parker. She arrives for the weekend, and Henry shows her off. Nancy comes on to Hawkeye while Henry is in surgery. Henry is reminded of his wife back home when Radar places a call for him, and

16 - The Ringbanger

Hawkeye and Trapper operate on a famous Colonel - after discovering that he is particularly ruthless about sacrificing his men, they come up with a scheme to get him sent back to the states with a little unwitting help from Frank, Margaret, and a drunk Henry.

17 - Heal Thyself

Colonel Potter turns crotchety when he catches the mumps, and his condition is worsened when Winchester gets the same disease and has to be quarantined with him. A temporary replacement surgeon, Newsome, is quickly brought into the 4077th and seems to be a gem in terms of both personality and abilit

17 - The Price

The 4077th is confronted by two crises: Colonel Potters mare, Sophie, mysteriously disappears from her corral, and Hawkeye and B.J. find themselves with a young Korean boy on their hands, who is trying to avoid conscription into the Army.

17 - Tea and Empathy

With British and American casualties heavy, the 4077ths supply of penicillin has been stolen. Father Mulcahy discovers, from Corporal Bryant, the location of some penicillin, and he and Klinger go out in search of it. They are shot at, but safely return with the drug and save the day.

17 - End Run

A former star college football player suffers a severe leg injury in combat and must deal with the consequences, and Major Burns goes behind Colonel Potters back to set up a boxing match between Klinger and Zale.

17 - Der Tag

Potter decides Frank would be less of a pain if the others were friendlier to him; they oblige, with some startling results.

17 - The Consultant

Dr. Borelli visits the 4077th to demonstrate his artery transplant technique. Unfortunately, being so close to the front at the 4077th causes Borellis drinking problem to interfere at the worst time - when a patient needs the transplant.

17 - For Want of a Boot

A riotous episode in which Hawkeye will do anything to get a new pair of boots: In order to get Zale to get him some, he must get an appointment for Zale with Futterman, the camp dentist, who will only do it if Henry will give him a pass to Tokyo, and Henry will only grant the pass if Houlihan will

17 - Sometimes You Hear the Bullet

Frank throws his back out whilst spending the evening with Margaret, and ends up in traction. He promptly applies for the Purple Heart, having been technically wounded at a frontline unit. Tommy Gillis, an old friend of Hawkeyes, is writing a book about the war, and pays him a visit. Later, Tommy is

18 - Old Soldiers

Hawkeye is appointed temporary commander of the 4077th when Colonel Potter rushes off to Tokyo on a mysterious mission. While in command, Hawkeyes main problem is housing a large group of Korean refugees comprised mainly of rambunctious children who need medical care.

18 - The Young and the Restless

A lecture on the latest techniques by a young surgeon from Tokyo, and a later demonstration of his surgical skill, turns Winchester into a drunk and Potter into an invalid, whilst bringing home to Hawkeye and B.J. that they are out of touch with new medical practices.

18 - Your Hit Parade

With the arrival of a shipment of records, Radar plays the part of a disc jockey and helps to get everyone through the incredibly long deluge of wounded.

18 - Hanky Panky

B.J. falls off the fidelity wagon while trying to provide consolation to a nurse whose marriage has just ended. But will he confess his infidelity to his wife?

18 - Hawkeye

Hawkeye is injured in a jeep accident and, aware he has a concussion, babbles to a Korean family to keep himself awake.

18 - House Arrest

Hawkeye is accused of hitting Frank and is placed under house arrest pending a court-martial. Meanwhile. Margaret is nervous about a visit from a meticulous female colonel.

18 - Operation Noselift

Private Baker, who is always going AWOL, is desperate for plastic surgery on his nose. Hawkeye gets an old friend, and plastic surgeon, to visit the camp, promising him a nurse called The Barracuda. They put together an elaborate scheme to perform the operation without Frank or Margaret finding out.

18 - Dear Dad...Again

Once again, Hawkeye writes home to his father, telling him of the latest gossip: the camp gets a new surgeon, who turns out to be a fake; Hawkeye bets he can walk into the mess tent naked for lunch, and no one will notice; Radar cheats on his final exam from the High School diploma company; Margaret

19 - Morale Victory

Tired of their constant complaints about the quality of recreational activities at the 4077th, Colonel Potter appoints Hawkeye and B.J. as the new morale officers. Winchesters morale has already reached a new peak: Hes ecstatic about his operation on a wounded soldier, Sheridan, which saved the boys

19 - Hot Lips Is Back in Town

Radar, who is smitten with the cute new nurse, Linda Nugent, relies on Hawkeyes expertise on how to cope with the situation. Hot Lips, meanwhile, celebrates her just-granted divorce by taking a step that arouses Colonel Potters ire.

19 - What;s Up, Doc?

Hot Lips, believing herself to be pregnant, asks Hawkeye to test her. The only rabbit available to use for the test is Radars pet, Fluffy. Meanwhile, Martinson, a patient, holds Charles at gunpoint, demanding he be sent back to Ohio.

19 - Hepatitis

The 4077th has an outbreak of hepatitis and Hawkeye needs to inoculate the reluctant staff while dealing with back pain.

19 - Some 38th Parallels

Frank tries to distinguish himself by selling the camp garbage, but its Hawkeye who finds a use for it: he dumps it on a troublesome Colonel Coner.

19 - Aid Station

Hawkeye, Houlihan, and Klinger go to an aid station at the front. Working closely together under heavy fire and unsanitary medical conditions, the three return to camp with new found respect for one another.

19 - The Chosen People

A Korean family set up camp in the middle of the compound. A Korean woman with a baby comes looking for the father, and names Radar. Civilian affairs relocates the family and blood tests prove Radar is not the father.

19 - The Longjohn Flap

The camp suffers from the severe cold, except for Hawkeye who has received some long johns from his father. They get passed around from person to person, as a gift, a gambling stake, a trade, a bribe, stolen, given up to Father Mulcahy, who gives them to Henry, who returns them to Hawkeye as thanks

20 - Lend a Hand

Irritated that the 4077th is planning a surprise party for him, Hawkeye volunteers to go to the aid of a wounded surgeon at the front. An additional irritant to Hawkeye is the arrival of Dr. Borelli, a wisecracking medical advisor with whom he habitually disagrees.

20 - C*A*V*E

The 4077th evacuation to a nearby cave to, avoid U.S. artillery fire on a Chinese target, poses problems for Hawkeye, who has a claustrophobia problem that Colonel Potter is unaware of. On the other hand, Margaret hates loud noises. And then theres the problem of a seriously wounded soldier...

20 - Mail Call Three

After a delay of three weeks, five sacks of mail arrive, and everyone in camp reacts to good and bad news from home. Hawkeye receives love letters addressed to another Benjamin Pierce, another man has approached B.J.s wife, and Radars mom has found a boyfriend. Klinger: I may not have a family in To

20 - The General;s Practitioner

General Korshak wants Hawkeye to be his personal practitioner, despite his constant snottiness. And Radar helps take care of a soldiers half-Korean baby after he is shipped back home.

20 - The Novocaine Mutiny

Frank has Hawkeye up on charges of mutiny, for usurping his authority when Potter was away on leave, and Frank was the C.O. The Judge Advocate, Colonel Carmichael, tries the case; BJ, Potter, and Radar are in attendance of the preliminary hearing to offer support for Hawkeye. There are several versi

20 - Love and Marriage

Hawkeye and Trapper prevent a GI from marrying a call girl who has TB, whilst trying to help a Korean soldier join his pregnant wife. Radar, of course, provides his usual invaluable help.

20 - As You Were

While there are no casualties, Hawkeye & Trapper crate up Frank while he sleeps and receive gorilla suits through the mail. Henry gets a tan and gives another sex orientation lecture. When the wounded start pouring in again, their own side shells the camp, hitting the generator, and Radar tries to g

20 - The Army-Navy Game

The camp tunes into the Army/Navy football game, only to be shelled and have an unexploded bomb land in the middle of the compound. They ring around trying to identify the bomb, and the camp prepares for the worst. Hawkeye and Trapper are left the task of following instructions to disarm the bomb, w

21 - Goodbye, Cruel World

Klinger redecorates his quarters, but the resultant ridicule he receives drives him to new heights in his efforts to get out of the Army. Meanwhile, the doctors are perplexed by the reaction of an Asian-American war hero who tries to kill himself when hes told that he will be going home. Sidney Free

21 - Rally ;Round the Flagg, Boys

The sinister Colonel Flagg pops up at the 4077th again, playing his usual spy games, convinced that Hawkeye is a communist sympathizer, after he saves the life of a North Korean soldier. Also, an American soldier is less than impressed.

21 - Temporary Duty

With a temporary transfer of personnel between the 4077th and the 8063rd, Captain Roy Dupree replaces Hawkeye, whilst Lorraine Anderson makes eyes at Charles. Fearing this to be permanent, Charles and B.J. successfully conspire to have Dupree permanently removed from the 4077th. Charles (to Hawkeye)

21 - Movie Tonight

Colonel Potter hopes a Western will be the cure for the 4077ths morale problem. But during the show, the staff of the camp is forced to make its own entertainment during the frequent film breakages.

21 - Smilin; Jack

The 4077th turns up a sick helicopter pilot, Smilin Jack, who doesnt want to quit, and a twice-wounded GI who does.

21 - Big Mac

The camp prepares for a visit from General MacArthur. Klinger dresses as the Statue of Liberty as the Generals jeep drives through the camp. MacArthur is so impressed, he salutes!

21 - Crisis

The supply lines to the camp are cut. Radar, the housing officer, starts doubling people up to save fuel and Klinger is thrown out of the nurses tent. People start burning everything to stay warm while Frank wears his heated socks. The toilet paper supply is worst hit, and then wounded start arrivin

21 - Sticky Wicket

Hawkeye and Frank argue over Franks surgical ability. Hawkeye performs a difficult operation and the patient does not recover, as he should. Hawkeye begins to doubt his ability and moves out of The Swamp. He decides to open up his patients again, and discovers a nick in the colon that even Frank adm

22 - Dreams

The 4077th cant escape the Korean War, even in its dreams. Exhausted after two days without sleep, members of the 4077th steal away for catnaps and experience dreams that reveal their fears, yearnings and frustrations.

22 - Preventative Medicine

On a sub-note, Klinger plays the part of a voodoo practioner to try and get out of the army.

22 - Potter;s Retirement

When bad reports are filed at headquarters, Col. Potter contemplates retirement.

22 - Souvenirs

Hawkeye and BJ try to stop a chopper pilot from selling souvenirs derived from war materials derived from locals facing danger getting them, and Klinger becomes a pole-sitter in his latest attempt to get a Section Eight.

22 - The More I See You

Hawkeye is reunited with a woman he thought was out of his life forever, but who never altogether leaves.

22 - Payday

Frank buys two sets of pearls, one for Margaret and one for his wife. After some talk, Radar gets Hawkeye $3,000 in lost earnings, Hawkeye gives it to Mulcahy for the orphans, but then the army wants the money back. Trapper wins big at poker after using Hawkeyes watch as a stake, so Hawkeye takes hi

22 - George

Burns tries to slap a dishonorable discharge on a decorated soldier who admits to being a homosexual, Private Weston. Weston: Two guys got beaten up in my outfit. One colored, the other homosexual. As you can see, Doc., Im not colored.

22 - Major Fred C. Dobbs

As usual Franks normal drone of verbal abuse upsets Ginger, so Hawkeye puts his arm in a cast while he is asleep. Frank puts in for a transfer, and after a broadcast goes out of Frank telling Margaret hes leaving, she decides to leave as well. As a result, Col. Blake puts both Hawk and Trap on doubl

23 - War Co-Respondent

B.J. finds himself attracted to a famous war correspondent, Aggie OShea, who has fallen in love with him.

23 - A Night at Rosie;s

A typical day in the life of Rosies bar, complete with AWOL problem drinkers, a bound and gagged Winchester, and a gambling scheme.

23 - Dr. Winchester and Mr. Hyde

Charles takes amphetamines to keep up his energy level, and even drugs Radars mouse, Daisy, so that it will win a race against a Marines mouse, Sluggo.

23 - Post Op

The 4077th is deluged with patients and their individual medical histories. Then they run out of blood and everyone is donating at 48-hour intervals.

23 - Deluge

A sudden deluge of wounded at the 4077th is followed by a fire and a rainstorm which makes matters difficult for the staff.

23 - White Gold

Colonel Flagg blows into camp trying to obtain penicillin to barter for information. But Flagg comes down with appendicitis, and the only penicillin he gets is in the keister.

23 - Mail Call

The arrival of a new batch of mail leaves Trapper depressed, and thinking of desertion, despite Hawkeyes efforts to dissuade him. Meanwhile, Hawkeye learns that he has successfully tricked Frank into buying stocks in a fictitious company, Pioneer Aviation.

23 - Ceasefire

General Clayton calls to say that a ceasefire is to be declared. The camp celebrates, Klinger gives away his dresses and locals start to take pieces of the camp. But Trapper does not believe it. Hawkeye claims he is married to avoid promises he made to several nurses. The party to celebrate the ceas

24 - Back Pay

Angered by the way civilian doctors in the States are profiting from the war, Hawkeye presents the Army with a bill for his medical services. Meanwhile, Charles reluctantly demonstrates American medical practices to three Korean medics, and is on the receiving end of their medical expertise.

24 - Ain;t Love Grand

The impossible happens for the snobbish Charles when he shares an emotional experience with Klinger, who discovers a U.S. nurse, Debbie, finds him and his bizarre attire attractive, while Charles succumbs to the exotic charms of a Korean girl, called Sooni, who he meets at Rosies Bar.

24 - Major Topper

The doctors have to deal with a short supply of morphine and too many patients while klinger has to deal with a corporal who may be crazier than him -- he shoots down imaginary enemies.

24 - Margaret;s Marriage

Pressured by Frank, Margaret decides to marry Colonel Donald Penobscott at the 4077th. When Donald arrives in camp, he is treated to a bachelor party and a practical joke while the nurses give Margaret a bridal shower.

24 - The Interview

Clete Roberts introduces this segment as his show; hes arrived at Korea to interview the staff of the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital because of its high 97% efficiency rating. In Roberts interviews with Hawkeye, BJ, Frank, Radar, Klinger, Mulcahy and Potter, they talk about how they cope with

24 - Abyssinia, Henry

Everyone is happy when Henry finds out that he is being discharged and sent home, and Hawkeye and Trapper decide to literally send him off in style...

24 - A Smattering of Intelligence

Frank is investigated by two crazy intelligence men, one whos convinced hes a communist, the others certain Franks a fascist.

24 - Showtime

Captain Kaplan is to be shipped home, but becomes paranoid that something will happen to him before he leaves. He takes the wheel of the jeep to drive to Kimpo himself, but crashes and ends up in plaster. Henrys wife is in labor and gives birth while he has Radar calling the hospital every 5 mins.An

25 - April Fools

A no-nonsense Colonel, who is notorious as a hard-nosed disciplinarian, visits the 4077th during an outbreak of April Fools Day pranksterism. Colonel Potter tries in vain to halt the mayhem before Colonel Tucker arrives in camp.

25 - The Party

Talk of a post-war reunion gives BJ an idea- planning a present-day stateside gathering of 4077th families. He continues to obsess with the idea even under the duress of bug-out instigated by a Chinese breakthrough. Also, Klinger fears that the party will blow his cover, as his mother doesnt know

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